The other day I was walking home from dropping my son at nursery when a scooter came flying past me (on the pavement I might add) at such speed that the huge child on it almost sent me flying, I was about to start F’ing and blinding but thought better of it (8am is too early to be reprimanded by the parents for swearing at their children).

Anyway, once I’d composed myself I realised the scooter flying down the pavement was being ridden not by an extremely large child, but in fact by an adult…yes an ADULT and one in a suit none the less. WHY DO ADULT HUMANS RIDE SCOOTERS?????? it drives me absolutely nuts and yes it could well be entirely irrational of me, but honestly scooters are meant for children and even then they’re annoying, adults on scooters look like absolute  %&$@*&!!!! And most annoying of all, they seem to think they look really slick as they whoosh down the streets of London, urgh what have we come to.

Once I was home I of course immediately ranted to Brute about the lunacy of it all, to which he shrugged and gave me a sort of  ‘get over it, there are worse things in the world’ kind of look. Well I of course know this, but I (and I hope some of you) cannot help but get irrationally (but to me totally rational) annoyed about certain things. This got me thinking and giggling about some of things that wind me up. When I said to Brute that my next blog was to be about ‘Pet Peeves’ he thought this to be terribly risky ‘you’ll alienate your audience, if you have one?’ he said, ‘people will think you’re a moody cow’ he said – both entirely possible but then I floated the idea with my sister and we spent the next hour in hysterics going back and forth with the silly things that really wound us up.

So I thought, what the hell, I’m going to go with it for nothing more than for people to have a good laugh at how irrational I am when it comes to things that annoy me. I secretly hope that some of you will be on the same page. Plus it’s a blog I can add to over time, as it is entirely inevitable that as I age more and more things will be able to join the heady heights of being listed as one of my pet peeves.

*please note the below list is not in order of most annoying to least, it is simply 10 I have selected (from a vast list…kidding ).

1. Adults on Scooters (please see above)
2. Groups of people who walk 2 or more abreast down the pavement and expect you to make way for them instead of vice versa. I am the annoying person who will hold my ground until their little pavement army is broken in half (insert smug face).
3. Drivers who only indicate to turn left or right literally as they are turning – Brute is extremely guilty of this and every time it throws me into a fit of irrational rage.
4. People who walk reaallllllyyyyyy slowly down the pavement – MOVE ASIDE – I literally power walk everywhere in London and assume everyone else should also (unless you are over 70, then you can be excused) when I go out to the countryside I’m happy to take my walking mph down a level, but otherwise you need to keep it moving.
5. When you let a car out in front of you or any other driving nicety and they don’t have the common courtesy to wave or flash their lights as a thank you – HAVE YOU NO MANNERS?? This move is entirely eligible for an F You (I weirdly always say it under my breath as if they will somehow hear me from their own car several meters away).
6. People who eat or chew loudly…urgh
7. People who don’t have their Oyster card ready when they get on the bus, or at the gates to the Tube – Why the hell aren’t you prepared??? there is no excuse!
8. Using #blessed #wanderlust #YOLO amongst others, it’s #cringe
9. People who send round-robin emails that begin by telling you you are the best person/mother/friend on the planet and end with ‘if you don’t send this email to 500 people in the next ten seconds you’re going to drop dead’. I will be going straight into my trash folder.
10. People who knock on your door after 6pm/7pm to try and sell you something, get you to sign up to a charity or join their religious cult – literally the very last thing I am going to do at the end of a busy day is be up for speaking to any of these people. The only person welcome at my door at that time or after is the Ocado delivery man – yes I know that sounds terribly snobby and no I don’t care.

 

Well that was actually really rather therapeutic. I do fully understand these are #firstworldproblems so don’t take it too seriously!

I highly recommend you all adding your own pet peeves to the comments below, I’ll add them on and we can create the ultimate list of pet peeves, and I mean who doesn’t need that?!?  I’ll re-share when we have a great chunk – Also I can promise that you’ll feel a small weight off your shoulders, so it’s a win win.